Baby birds and lots of guilt

How could I have done that?
How could I not have known?
How could I have drowned a helpless baby wren?

It was an accident, that's for sure. But I still feel just awfu about it. I even hate to talk about it. But I will, if nothing more than to honor his or her short life. I want to cry.

I was watering the newbie plants and flowers in the front yard at GardenSpirit this morning. I'd been there since shade filled the yard til the blazing midday sun was making it Big Self known -- drying out the soil instantly.

Almost done, just a few more creeping shrubs and–the hanging baskets! I took the hose and slathered water into both of them, one at a time, until the water ran dripping out the bottoms.

I knew a wren had built a nest in one of the baskets, but there was not a peep from inside...and it had been a long time since the nest was built. I assumed the babies were gone or that momma had abandoned the nest for a better location.

Finally finished and I went down the steps to turn off the spigot. I heard a soggy thud and looked over to see a tiny baby wren gasping for air on the ground. It was soaking wet, its little beak opening and closing trying to find some air.

I was horrified. This tiny baby, fallen from a height that might have killed it anyway, was struggling for air because of me. Me. Me and my big hose, my big plans. And there was nothing I could do. Absolutely nothing.

Picking up the baby would have guaranteed its death - the mother bird won't feed babies tainted with human scent. So I left it there...likely to die. The momma bird was back before I left, "Go down to the ground," I wanted to scream. "See if you can save your baby."

It was a bad place for a nest, let's face it. Even a heavy rain might have drowned the babies. But rain has been scarce in these parts for a long long time. They might have made it -- this one at least had survived. Until now.

I would have gladly sacrificed the hanging basket for these babies. I just didn't know. I didn't know.

Somehow, that doesn't make me feel any better. I'm gonna quit now. I wish I could take it all back. Baby bird guilt is one of the worst.